Three Tiny Wheel Pieces

I do not like making things on the potter’s wheel; it makes my back and hips and knees hurt. But I had to make some for class, so I gave it a go.

This is raku-fired. I don’t like the inside and wish I could refire it to make it look better. I might just take some India ink to is and darken it up a bit.

The handle on this wanted to be a snake, so I let it. It now used to hold the mousetoys that Forrest doesn’t play with anymore.

The Infamous Dildo

When I signed up for a Human Sexuality course the same semester that I signed up for the Ceramics course, I joked that I could make models of genitals out of clay and get credit for both courses.

A few days after the semester started, the H.Sex teacher made an offhand comment about wanting a dildo to demonstrate how to put a condom on, but not wanting to spend ridiculous amounts of money on molded plastic. She also said that she asked her son to make one in woodworking shop, but he wouldn’t do it.

Hmm, I thought. My uncle likes woodworking and has a lathe; I wonder what he’d say if I asked him to make a dildo for my teacher. And then I thought, I am taking a ceramics class. I can make one.

So the next day I hung around after class, told her I was taking ceramics, and asked if she wanted me to make a dildo. She thought that would be awesome.

What size? “Average.”

Any particular color? “Funky.”

No thumbnails today since I don’t want to be censored by nannyware. Click through to see photos of the finished product.

The Right Side

The Underside

The Left Side

The Tip

I had lots of Ideas for ways to decorate it, but this won out. I thought it would be great to put hearts and flowers and little mating bunnies on it, but I only have the drawing chops for flowers. Several of the guys in the class were somewhat offended– not that I made it, but that I decorated it. Apparently it’s disrespectful or something like that. The teacher was neutral, and the guy who made a teapot with a penis spout thought it was great.

It’s raku fired, and then coated with Duncan brand ceramic sealer to keep the moisture out– have to be able to wipe the lube off, after all. (Many props to the folks at Mile High Ceramics, who didn’t even bat an eye when I whipped it out and asked for something to make it waterproof.)

The Infamous Dildo now resides with Betsy Cairo, PhD of Cryogam Colorado. One of these days I’ll get up there and take a picture of it in its new home.

Perhaps I’ll work on my copulating-bunny drawing skills, and make another one. Unless I can think of something even more disrespectful to put on it, of course.

catchup: two versions of the same bag

This is the first version. The double-crochets and big arches make it very stretchy which is nice, but as it’s such a large bag in the first place stretch is not always good.

This is the second version, in which I replaced the double-crochets with singles. It’s far less vertically stretchy, but as I made the base too large, it’s also a very big bag.

catchup: bpa-free water bottle cozy

J was using an old Nalgene water bottle, but after the BPA revelexplosion, he found these stainless steel bottles at REI. (I had one in green, but I lost it on the bus.) It’s not insulated, so it sweats in the summer and leaves rings on the table and is also uncomfortable to pick up, so I made a cozy for it. I wanted it to be open so the color could show through, but the holes are big enough for fingers to poke through also. Will need to try again.

Ravelry project page.

catchup: two very old afghans

You can’t see it, but this is a waffle pattern similar to thermal underwear. It’s really loose, so it’ll probably get unravelled and re-crocheted with a smaller hook to make it tighter. Eventually.

Similarly, this one is also very loose. I made this for my grandparents, and reclaimed it when they died. At some point, I’ll re-work this one also and tighten it up.